This week's college football picks: U-Dub-Dub back in action!

Nearly nine months after one of the most stunning and impressive victories in recent college football history, Wisconsin-Whitewater returns to the gridiron to open its 2008 campaign.

U-Dub-Dub hosts St. Xavier University (which is located in Chicago and is an NAIA school) at the friendly confines of Perkins Stadium.

This showdown is just one of many that promise to be lopsided affairs this weekend. Check out this week's picks, and you'll notice that it's tough to go out on a limb ...

No. 2 Wisconsin-Whitewater over St. Xavier
No. 5 Florida over Miami (Fla.)
No. 8 West Virginia over East Carolina (though, was really tempted to make this the "Upset pick of the week")
No. 11 Wisconsin over Marshall
No. 15 Brigham Young over Washington

Upset pick of the week: Stanford over No. 15 Arizona State

And our totally random college football pick of the week: North Dakota over St. Cloud State (FYI ... North Dakota smoked Texas A&M-Kingsville in its Division 1 debut last week)

Last week's record: 7-1

Tuesday Afternoon Middle Linebacker: Looking forward to Week 1, and the 2008 season

"Worst Prediction of the Year: Jim Reineking of Fox Sports, for a spectacular feat of multiple bad predictions." -- Gregg Easterbrook, in a column published on NFL.com on Feb. 14, 2006.

If Gregg Easterbrook can write a long-winded, diarrhea-of-the-keyboard column about pro football, so can we ...

Football season officially kicks off Thursday night when the defending Super Bowl champion Giants host the Redskins for what should be a spirited game of football. This is good for America.

Let's kick off Kickoff week by taking a look at how the NFL power rankings would look like if it were like the BCS (well, kinda ... it has much less controversy).

(Of course, this is more like the preseason polls, since no games -- preseason/exhibition contests don't count, silly -- have been played.)

Here are the very first Just-Totally-Made-Up NFL BCS^TM rankings of the season (just the top 12, or the number of teams that would make the playoffs if the playoff teams were based totally on the Just-Totally-Made-Up NFL BCS^TM formula, which isn't really a formula at all) ...

1. New York Giants: Surprising victors of Super Bowl XLII are still tops until they suffer that first loss, which could come as soon as Thursday against the Redskins.

2. New England Patriots: That 18-1 finish last season still isn't good enough to claim the top spot in this poll.

3. San Diego Chargers: Madman linebacker Shawne Merriman vows to play with two torn knee ligaments, which should be an interesting storyline to follow this season to say the least.

4. Indianapolis Colts: It might be a bit premature to think that the "window of opportunity" is closing on these horseshoe-clad gridders.

5. Dallas Cowboys: Hard to give too much respect a team that hasn't won a playoff game in 12 years.

6. Jacksonville Jaguars: Out to end Indy's reign of terror in the AFC South.

7. Seattle Seahawks: Mike Holmgren hoping to go out in a blaze of glory.

8. Pittsburgh Steelers: Will face still challenge from Cleveland.

9. Philadelphia Eagles: Darkhorse Super Bowl contender in NFC.

10. Cleveland Browns: Hype machine could go into overdrive if Brownies manage a victory over the Cowboys on national television.

11. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Can an aging Jeff Garcia keep it up? Magic Eight Ball says, "Definitely."

12. New York Jets: Brett Favre is in town, and Jerricho Cotchery and Dustin Keller are going to have huge years. We know this because all three are on our fantasy football team.

Teams in danger of relegation if the NFL were like European soccer ...

30. Miami Dolphins: Bill Parcells has a lot of work to do. A lot of work.

31. Atlanta Falcons: Rookie Matt Ryan takes over where Michael Vick unceremoniously left off.

32. Kansas City Chiefs: Very definition of "rebuilding."

For fun, let's make some quick predictions ...

Five non-playoff teams in 2007 who could make the playoffs this season:

1. Cleveland Browns: 2007 playoffs would have been more fun had Cleveland made it to the party.

2. New Orleans Saints: Drew Brees leads what should be a potent offense in the Big Easy.

3. Minnesota Vikings: Everybody's vogue pick to unseat the Packers in the NFC North.

4. New York Jets: Favre-to-Cotchery, touchdown Jets ... sounds like music to our fantasy football team's ears.

5. Buffalo Bills: Buffalo/Toronto Bills feature a rebuilt defense, which includes first-round pick Leodis McKelvin (McLovin'?).

Five playoff teams from 2007 who could be in for a fall:

1. Green Bay Packers: A-Rod takes over for Favre, but is backed up by rookies Matt Flynn and Brian Brohm. Hope No. 12 can stay healthy.

2. Tennessee Titans: Vince Young is better at making plays with his legs than his arm, which would be OK if he were a running back.

3. Washington Redskins: That NFC East is downright tough, and some team is going to have to get left out of the postseason fun.

4. Pittsburgh Steelers: Face one of toughest schedules in NFL this season.

5. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Given the relative strength of the NFC East, only one NFC South team likely will make the playoffs. With an offensively-scary Saints team and Jake Delhomme's return in Carolina, the Buccaneers could be left out.

Week 1 predictions:

Giants over Redskins
Lions over Falcons
Bengals over Ravens
Seahawks over Bills
Jets over Dolphins
Patriots over Chiefs
Saints over Buccaneers
Eagles over Rams
Steelers over Texans
Jaguars over Titans
Cowboys over Browns
Chargers over Panthers
Cardinals over 49ers
Colts over Bears
Vikings over Packers
Broncos over Raiders

College football season kicks off soon ... and then some totally random thoughts

It's such a great time of year to be a fan of the sports stuff. Baseball pennant races are heating up, the kickoff of Week 1 of the NFL season is just a week away, and college football starts its season this weekend. With that fun in mind ...

You didn't ask for 'em, but here are our college football picks for this weekend:

No. 13 Wisconsin over Akron
No. 3 Southern California over Virginia
No. 5 Florida over Hawai'i
No. 6 Missouri over No. 20 Illinois
No. 18 Tennessee over UCLA
No. 7 LSU over Appalachian State

FYI, there will be no Appalachian State-type upset of a major college football powerhouse this year. That was a once-in-a-lifetime, lightning-doesn't-strike-the-same-place-twice type of occurrence. With that in mind, let's go out on a limb ...

Upset pick of the week: Utah over Michigan

And our totally random college football pick of the week: Sacred Heart over Assumption College

Some other random thoughts on sports ...

Who is FOX going to put on prime-time TV in October when the New York Yankees fail to make the playoffs?

Was watching the Best Damn Sports Show Period (yes, it's still on the air) last night at one of our favorite local watering holes and Petros Papadakis was on talking college football. Seeing Papadakis (Photo, he's the dude on the left) makes me realize just how far Southern California football had come in just a very short period of time. Just a few years ago, Papadakis was a running back for the Trojans. Here he's looking more like LenDale White after a trip to the Ponderosa buffet than Reggie Bush.

Apparently, Brett Favre isn't on God's fantasy football team ...

This year's championship fantasy football team

"The darkest secret of fantasy sports? Nobody in the world cares about your team but you. Nobody!" -- FOXSports.com frequent contributing columnist Peter Schrager in "Fantasy football rules to live by this season."

Yes, nobody wants to hear about your fantasy team.

Please, no watercooler talk should revolve around how the Seahawks pulling Julius Jones for T.J. Duckett in a goal-line situation screwed you from winning your fantasy football game. All you'll get is an uncomfortable nod of the head and a polite listener attempting to change the subject to something else, like what Rachel Ray's got cooking in the kitchen today.

We don't care about those unwritten rules of owning a fantasy team (well, we do, but not so much in this here forum). This is "Greatest Pro Bowls of all time, and other stuff" and we do whatever we feel like.

With that philosophy in mind, we present the team that will win the NFL.com fantasy league this season ...

Pos Round Player
QB 6 (#64) Favre, Brett (QB NYJ)
RB 1 (#9) Portis, Clinton (RB WAS)
RB 3 (#33) Turner, Michael (RB ATL)
WR 2 (#16) Colston, Marques (WR NO)
WR 4 (#40) Johnson, Calvin (WR DET)
WR 5 (#57) Cotchery, Jerricho (WR NYJ)
TE 10 (#112) Daniels, Owen (TE HOU)
K 15 (#177) Longwell, Ryan (K MIN)
DST 11 (#129) Seahawks (DST SEA)
RS 9 (#105) Rodgers, Aaron (QB GB)
RS 8 (#88) Williams, Ricky (RB MIA)
RS 7 (#81) Driver, Donald (WR GB)
RS 13 (#153) Walter, Kevin (WR HOU)
RS 12 (#136) Keller, Dustin (TE NYJ)
RS 14 (#160) Packers (DST GB)

Yes, we have Brett Favre AND Aaron Rodgers!

The worst ballpark experience in baseball

"Losing feels worse than winning feels good." -- Vin Scully.



Hall-of-Fame broadcaster Vin Scully should consider himself lucky that he doesn't experience the carnage that takes place in the stands of the stadium he so cherishes.

Scully sits perched high above the stands and comfortably in a press box among the throngs of buffet-fed reporters who often wax poetic about Dodger Stadium's views through rose-colored glasses.

Such is the case with Dodger Stadium. You hear about how beautiful a ballpark it is, nestled snugly in Chavez Ravine with a spectacular view (if smog doesn't obstruct the view) of Los Angeles' neighboring hills and mountains. You also hear about how visionary the team was when it built this place shortly after it relocated from Brooklyn to Los Angeles in the late 1950s. Yet, the place has a sinister side.

Dodger Stadium has the worst ballpark experience in the league.

One night at the old ballpark revealed plenty. The fans don't care. They don't care about other people. They don't care about the game. There's just no respect. It's out of hand, and security seems helpless or simply doesn't care, too.

A simple Google search for "Dodger Stadium" and "fans" is significant ...

LAPD asked to be deployed at Dodger Stadium

A fan post saying, "I'd hate to live here with these silly fans"

Just another day at the old ballpark

A blog post appropriately titled "Dodger Stadium: Baseball Hell"

Poor stadium security allows Dodgers-Giants rivalry to escalate into food brawl

Beer thrown at Padres fans; security does nothing

Turns out aforementioned incident occured when Dodgers honored Jackie Robinson

If you add "unruly" in front of "fan" in said Google search, it gets a bit darker ...

Woman legally blind in one eye from punch

Three stabbed in brawl at Dodger Stadium

Woman punches another woman who's seven months pregnant

Fatal shooting at Dodger Stadium

Just three months ago, the tide was turned. We were in Milwaukee, watching the Brewers play the Dodgers. A number of Dodgers fans were on hand, certainly making their presence felt among the masses sporting Brewers blue and gold. In Milwaukee -- where, keep in mind, fans can show up hours in advance to tailgate and have the opportunity to get plenty of beer in their system before game time -- the Dodgers fans were treated more as a curiousity than anything else, like, "wow, look, they made the trip all the way from L.A. to come to our Miller Park."

Fast forward three months, and a tandem of brave fans sporting Brewers gear sitting a few rows ahead of us were showered with antagonizing taunts of, "F--- Milwaukee" from fans whose IQ likely matched their blood-alcohol level. Please keep in mind that there were little kids in the stands, too.

Simply sitting in the stands, quietly (very quietly) supporting your favorite team -- even if it's the opposition -- is too much to ask at Dodger Stadium.

Later, some unruly fans were kicked out. Stuff was thrown in their general direction. Security was too busy manhandling a couple miscreants to notice. There was more antagonizing of the Brewers fans, but Brewers fan is too smart to take the bait.

When the Brewers fans fail to take the bait, Dodgers fans turn on each other ... UCLA vs. USC is a popular topic for "discussion." Apparently, at least one of the fans whose IQ matched their BAC went to UCLA (yes, UCLA, which before Friday night at 9 p.m. or so was actually viewed as a "good academic institution.")

There's more swearing with little kids sitting in the vicinity.

Of course, fans of this nature are awarded with more beer when they return to the concession stands.

Something happens on the field. The Dodgers apparantly score a run.

"F--- Milwaukee."

The heart begins to pound a bit faster. And you begin to realize why fans leave Dodger Stadium early.

Just another night at the old ballpark.

Take me out to the ball game,
Take me out with the crowds;
Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack,
I don't care if I come back.

Apparently, through all this, a game was going on. It was simply background fodder for the noise going on in the stands, which is like 15 TVs on 15 different channels going at full volume. It's hard to consider the play that might take place on the field with men on second and third, two out and an All-Star player at the plate. Whatever happened, it wasn't good for the Brewers.

"F--- the Brewers."

It was time to go.